“I AM I AM” -2

April 1, 2017

I seem to want to share with you what’s going on with me. It’s not that I want to sit here and be typing this. It seems, just, right. Not in trying to please someone or something, I’m not trying to please God anymore, I am God. So in recognizing I’m God, how do I live? Then live? I’m a normal kind of guy, for an American me. I’m simply me. I’ve documented my past many times in online documents that I’ve written, posted, and published even in book form, for anybody wanting them.

I want to be me, and I am starting a new beginning with, to be me, at some 66 years old. I’m learning. I’m still learning, to be me. I sought it not, I sought to please God, most of my life, until a few weeks ago, maybe days. I had a meltdown not, I had a revelation that Christ I am, I am I AM. No matter what is capitalized in that phrase or not, I am God Most High not connected with other not, I am God Most High connected with all peoples of the earth and I am not below me again. There’s no condescension here, in me. I am, beginning to be me. In a different way. I use punctuation differently, and I’ve become a Christ who does so, life with another, all being you, who realize now God you are. And we come out of us, our comfort zone, our past; and forge something new, who empty nursing homes and heal people, because we become healers, we become present. Present in the Present, I want to be me.

I want to be wantless, but I want love, loved. I want you to be loved. I want you to perish not in your own sins of thinking you are separate from me, or each other, and certainly not God; for you ARE God, and the sooner we realize this thing, predicament we’re in, we may can get out, if we love each other, to wholeness again.

I’m a regular guy, love motorcycles, want another one again. I have a little motor scooter now, a great one, and I enjoy it. But I love the bigger bikes too, and I want one again. I want want not to drive me. I want want not to force me, to obliterate me again, for I am Wisdom. It, is me. The Real Me is Christ I Am. Not in love with other, I release Christ to be Christ again, without religion interfearing. And the artifacts that reside still in my brain from that era when I was trying to satisfy Christ to be acceptable to Christ of another race, shall end now. I’m ending my dependence on Christ, the religion of. And I divorce that Christ, and I call it Christless, for it’s powerless, in my life, and all other, now, that I’ve arrived, at what I am. I am am. I just am. I’m present. In the now.

I love you all to be so too, like me. Well how do I live? And why do I think someone may want to live like me? I want to live without want, that drives me. I don’t want to be driven by want, or advertisers, or religions. I don’t want to be driven by you, to do something, that incarcerates me. I don’t want to be you in your life that’s me in my life that’s received your words and me be trying to emulate what you think. I’ll think for myself thank you. I’m naive, not again. I’m gullible, for my own words, not again. My thoughts shall not trick me into revelation other. I am Christ Christ’d by me, and I shall serve me notice, that my judgment works, on me. First and foremost I just me a Christ, and Christ’d I am, by it, that serves me want not of you, but want I want only to be saved from me. My judge and jury is Christ and I am the Sentencer, the Great and Almighty Oz that has pulled back the curtain of I am to see who’s at the controls, of the movie The Wizard of Oz. You see, I’m no more fooling myself God cares about me; I’m God, and I care about me, and I’m not separate from you, O One of You, who think you need God, or must please another. I mature God now, and that’s my role. Not because I want it, but because I’m still alive and I’ve become Christ and I do the miracles now and people will be pleased not, they will ask questions. How did this little man become Christ?

I became Christ because I died. I arose, and I am here. In a 66 year old body, I am grace of me, in not you. I am in a body of belief, not of you, who want not to be me. I am no more fashioned by you, of a grace mind other, nor of one of control. I am out of control, and it shall no more rule me. I try not to please God, God is me. There’s no other God. I am it. I surrender.

I am no longer forming God, by what I thought in the past. I thought it was mighty, to serve not, but to rule. God ruled, me. In my thinking I had thoughts that formed God that formed me. I lived by the rules. I went to church. I tithed, tried to. Gave much away. I tried hard to succumb to the theories current Christianity, and I tried hard to pray and be a man of prayer. I had much on my heart. Trying to pay all the bills and operate according to the images I was embracing, tormented me, not; I did, for I had the wrong images. Imaged to me were things I thought were right, pure, truthful, holy; and I did not want to blaspheme or be ungrateful. I knew God existed, I just thought it, was not me.

I was wrong. I was faithful to a blessing to serve Christ, and rob me of my Christship. I was God in flesh, but wrongfully served it, sometimes, for to gratify flesh, in want, of want. I wanted sometime just to please me, but then felt bad about it, for I had these “programs” operating on me that gave me a life of other, to think by. I thought by principles of affliction, and afflicted me with them. I had the Bible, of conflict. I had the Bible, of Christ, that I thought taught me was another; a man in flesh, with character perfect, perfect build, never lost a what he did, simple in perfection, perfect light, that I let be a character builder for me, not; but a tormenter. I did not call it that, I served, it. I served the image, of it. I served an image of God, that I imaged to me, and to others. I taught it. I died, to all rational logic thought of it being otherwise. I had logic worked out to be me, that served it, to be God according to all that I heard and understood the Bible to be, teaching me to be, about My Father’s Business.

Hell I lived in for awhile, not; I was tormented by the past, not; I was tormented by the present, I was living in. My wife loved me, but why didn’t she want to kiss me, more? She didn’t kiss me, she let me kiss her. She never held my hand; she let me hold hers. She laughed and we enjoyed laughter at times and had friendship. I was to pay the bills. That was my role. I was to be provider, for our children, and my family, as God had said, as Christianity was taught, to me. I gave my life to finding God. I went “down the rabbit hole” in search of God. I did what I thought I was to do, but when I began out of the ordinary searches, searching for answers, beyond the normal thought of normal thought of normal Christian orthodox thought, I was out the box, Jack, and I had not the answers, and learned that they did not either, who were teaching me. When I went for answers to understand to rulers and elders and pastors and leaders for help in questing to know God, I was naive, so naive. Instead of receiving answers, or even encouragement, I was seen as a trouble maker. Why was I asking questions? When the standard answer was not enough that people had believed for generation, I was soon a cast-out. People who had been my religious leaders in the past became my condemners. I was off, and needed to “get right” with God, they said.

Puzzled, I did not give up, on God, being reachable.

I didn’t know God was me. I was impenetrable, in thought not, but searching, always drawing a line, or a curtain shut between God and me. God was a gender, a gender’d God, for Christ was a man, Jesus. And Jesus was not feminine, I thought; but I was wrong. O so wrong, I lived my life, for Christ to be other, than me. I searched. I prayed endless hours. I wrote notes. I wrote the “first-person” words of God for years. I made videos and recorded messages and taught lessons. I quested, for God. But in all my words, of first-personing God’s words to me, I began to be taught that I was God. I WAS a God, that God was, ALL of us, who never separated again. From each other. From Him, not; but HER!

God is not masculine, God is feminine! So at a point of realizing I am Christ and receiving my words each day and delivering them in love, wantless, I began to “realize” I am a woman, in what seems to be MY body. So I relented, and began dressing as a woman. All in my quest to please, to become, to do. Do. Do. Do. Become. I was always, becoming. Pleasing. Not that I said that. I didn’t recognize it, as such, as I do now.

I’ve become the now in love with God, who is all of us, who know it now, or not. We are the Christs and the Christnots. We are the Gods and the Godless who all one mind is, thinking differently. All long as we all think differently, we are separated, separate, creations of our own thought, thinking it into existence, to be corroborated by what we think and deem as evidence. We empirically validate our own thoughts because we determine what evidences confirm to us that we are right; on the right track, to God, or being “saved”.

All this has gone bye bye for me, and I am God, knowing it, letting you know I am. I am God. You are too, when you will know it. But it’s a transformation process. It doesn’t happen by decision. “Decision” for Christ is anomalous to reality. Reality is truth transcendent of what you think about it or not, but wait!!! If I think about it, I create IT! Oh my gosh, what can I think of that I don’t create, the corroboration of? How can I swirl in this vortex of thought, without getting sucked in by it?

Magnetically induced thinking is not something we talk about, but it’s real, more real than real. We live in a world that is magnetically induced, a world that is dipole’d. Magnetic influence influences us. We are subject to magnetism. We are metal’d, magically. We think alchemy of not, but we are flesh dipole’d, and something spins us. What spins us is want. Want drives us. Want makes the world go round. Want keeps us in the influence of other, that God I am, We are. It.

The force of Want is inestimable, and unstoppable not, but ceasing in your tracks, you can contain it, not; but you can surrender to it no more for it to create you no more in your own creation of your own self, in separation, of each other. I am changing God because I am it. God is ignorant. God is ignorant no more, for I teach it to be it. God shall no more embrace the theory that it is separate. God is I am. I am God. I hate you not, I love you, for all to be God, Most High, knowing it now. Concerned not with other, fight it not; there is no fight in God’s life, there is only surrender to it. I surrender to me, to no one else, not; but to ALL me, for we are ALL I AM. No more diced up, by foolish thinking, that God is other than I am. I am is God race. God race of I am is I am. In love with you all, I am, Am.

I am a man. I am a woman. No matter how I dress, I am you I am with a mind no more separated from you, for you cannot separate from mine, but you can try, and trying to be separate you can create your own separation from me, but that does not mean you’re separate from me, it means you can create your own confusion and molecular become the dose of to you that creates it. I’m inoculated by me no more to be separate. Religion no more injects its venom into me. I snake you not, I call you God, induced no more by you to be separate, among a race of magnetically induced Gods to be separate. I am no more subject to magnetism, called gravity, or not. Subject to your thinking no more, I reject your religions, and ALL you GODS, no matter what its name. I reject it all. I am Am ALL IN ONE.

One I live in and take my breath now, away from you not again. I breath breathe into the real, to create it, to create the real, magnetically induced thinking no more by. Buy man’s theory no more that God we serve. God exists to be it. Grow up. And I am learning how, as a man who quested to know God, who’s been taught I am. I am Am, no matter what you call me, I am learn’ed me now, not your equations with, that keep your algorithms self-thinking unto you into you to create it me separation of. I forfeit that. I reject it not; I realize that’s what I did, for most of my life, but I’m coming out, as a woman not, but a I am. I am I am declaring it, and I make a race of I am’s, all being I am, all a race of am; no matter what you call it, Israel’s about. Time timeless, it’s all over for the religionists, for I am religionless, without want, without want to be saved from you. You are powerless to power me with your thought, and you will not amperage me, nor wattage me. I am what are you, no more saying. I read your mind, by your love, that you shield not from me. Magnetic no more, I’m a regular guy, who loves racquetball and skiing, and hopes to have another motorcycle soon.

I love you. More coming. I’m writing now, regularly hopefully, so we all realize, we are One. The One we all waited for, the One we all thought was another, and taught it so, will now have come, in The One You are. I am.

Loving you all,

Theodore Joseph Cottingham
April 1, 2017 about 9am